the state of Helen

So I haven't been feeling very well lately. It seems once things calm down for me, I get restless, which then turns into depression, which then turns into me being a slug, not doing anything but watching EastEnders while trying to forget that I have to read a book for tomorrow's class that I haven't yet begun.

I don't know what it is that makes me this way.

In other ways I'm very happy. I went to a lecture last night at the National Theatre on a new biography about Casanova that one of the actors in a current production there gave. Bought the book; got it signed. Also bought tickets for three movies that the BFI is playing over the next two weeks. Next week I'm going to see Breakfast at Tiffany's and Some Like it Hot . The former I've seen many times but think it'll be really cool to see it on a big screen. The latter I've only seen scenes from. The following week I'm seeing Lolita which I have never seen, not even read the book.

However, my classes are really depressing and I'm rather lonely. It's not just friends but I really want a man friend, if you get what I mean, but whereas I had guys chasing me back home (usually weird stalkerish guys, though) I haven't had so much as a guy give me a one-over here.

And It's been very grey and rainy/snowy here. One day a week of sun is a little unnerving.

So this is me at the moment. At least I'm not ranting and raving as I did last semester. I'm pretty solemn this semester. Just chillin' out, waiting for something to happen.