day at the theatre

Today:

Woke at 9:50.

Ate cheerios and went online: myspace, facebook, yahoo mail, twitter, The Times (London), davidtennant.com

Hurriedly dressed into usher outfit -- white collared shit got in mens department, black socks, black pants, black vest, clip-on black bow tie, black flats -- a little eye makeup and walked the some 8 blocks or so to Stanton and Negley to catch a bus into town.

It is sunny today, mildly warm. The walk is refreshing and I get to town in time to read a few pages of "I Capture the Castle" that Abby suggested I read. The sisters in the story travel to London to bring home clothes that their now dead Aunt Millicent left behind.

Walk to the theatre to usher for "Legally Blonde, the Musical." Sign in with the lady just as I walk into the only door of the six that is open to admit ushers, walk down the stairs to the usher room, take my card with my name on it out of the filing cabinet, and walk back upstairs. Wait in the lobby for the meeting to begin.

Manager goes over how long the show is, any seating holds (for this show there is one long one at the beginning -- 12 minutes): this is when we can't seat any late comers. How much of the house we have, which I can't relate here. For some reason it is a big deal for us to tell others.

I rush in the line that indicates that I want the 2nd door downstairs to usher at. I am assigned to the door by giving my downstairs boss my card which she will take down to stamp with the date so they know I was here today. You have to do 22 shows a year or (supposedly) you are fired. I have never done that many shows and haven't yet been fired.

We wait until 12:30 to see if there are any cast changes to stuff into the programs. There are. Two. Plus we have two other papers to stuff, one encouraging (upon penalty of death) for patrons to subscribe to the rest of the series and the other one to advertise a show currently playing at another theatre that is also a part of the cultural trust.

Takes a good 30 minutes to stuff all the programs. The theatre can be fined a hefty amount of money if someone (a journalist especially) does not find papers announcing a casting change in their program, as then if they were to write in their paper that a certain person was good and it was not that person, well then apparently the world would fall a part. It is over a 1,000 dollar fine and so we have to make sure every program has an announcement in it.

I was assigned Penn Avenue door, which means that before, during intermission, and after the show I have to stand in front of these doors that lead out into Penn Avenue so that people will not go out them at any time. A lot of people like to go out these doors, as the car park that many people use when going to see a show at our theatre is right outside the door. Despite the warning -- do not use this door, alarm will be sounded -- in bold letters, and me standing there (waif-like) with my hands on my hips, they still try to get past me. Today however, for one of the only times (since The Lion King some years ago) we opened these doors after the show because we had such a large house.

People are allowed into the theatre foyer at 1:00 and by 1:30 we open the doors to the inside of the theatre. At this point, I go to my door and seat people. A lot of the people who come here regularly (and are older and look like they're rich) become rather upset if you ask them if they need help finding their seat, and will brush past you, or say, sternly, "I just need a program." They are funny.

Had a lot of pre-adolescent and teenage girls in short skirts for the show today, with very high heels, both of which were mainly pink. The lead character's "signature colour" is pink.

The show begins 5 minutes after it is scheduled. Regardless, we still got late seaters. We had about five. They had to wait 12 minutes until they could be taken in. We were told a particular phrase the actor would say that would indicate when we could. Took them in. Dark theatre. We have little flashlights (mine is jewel encrusted pink -- fake, of course, but pretty) to help us find the row.

Most shows I stand up in the back of the theatre, mostly because there aren't any seats. Even when there are open seats, there are rules about those you can sit in. They have to be at the back. You can't sit in front of a patron, or next to them. Result: no seats to sit in.

20 minute intermission. Back at Penn Avenue Door, next to the bartender. Ask for a diet coke just before the show starts. Ushers get free drinks. Go downstairs to eat peanut butter ritz crackers. Not allowed to eat upstairs. Go back into the theatre. Watch the end of the show.

Favourite moment of any show: when the show is over and the actors come out for applause.

Always hate the people who leave just when the show ends. They may have good reason, but I still dislike them.

Back to Penn Avenue door at end to let people know there is a step so they don't fall down and sue the theatre. They're obsessed with being sued. We're not even allowed to help people on walkers or otherwise handicapped for fear that something will go wrong and we will be sued. I still help people walk to their seats who need it.

Grab purse. Happen to catch a bus back to Negley and Stanton just in time. Walk home the 20 minutes it takes.

Home at 5:30-ish.