interview cont. and storms

The interview went fine. I thought it would be worse. I haven't had great experiences with "superiors" lately, what with London -- a professor who doesn't tell me i've failed a paper when I go to see her when I'm having problems with my classes, even though she knows that I have. Man that school was rubbish.

I figured the interview would be quite horrid, that the interviewer would be nasty, and I would feel the need to cry in the middle of it all. I'm really emotional right now. I cry at the drop of a hat. But it was actually a pleasant experience. There were some questions that I quite loathed (name five qualities you can bring to any business). I don't know if it is out of sheer laziness or stupidity, but I can never come up with something. Probably just the fact that I am not a professional in anything yet. Just coming out of college. I can't really bring anything to these places. I can type 100 words a minute, I'm organized, I have enthusiasm, I'm loyal and dedicated-- Shit. I just answered the question. Hmmm.

People make me nervous. They all seem to have hidden agendas. Most are not want they seem (pretend) to be. (Paranoid much?).

People are weird.

It stormed a lot tonight. I enjoyed it, except the tornado warning part. Ended up not being near me, but I was still properly freaked. I've had nightmares since I was little of tornadoes, and not being able to get to the basement in time. That is one of my recurring nightmares. Another is waking up in my bed and none of my lights working. Not my light on my ceiling or the one beside my bed. Although, I'm not scared of the dark consciously, and don't remember ever being. Both dreams I think have to deal with a loss of control. Fearing not having something to depend on. A tornado that can wipe out your self and your house; a darkened room you can't see in, so that anything can attack you without you being prepared.

I'm a bit of a control freak.

But not a person control freak. As far as I can tell. If I don't like the way a person acts, I either distance myself from them or somehow deal with it if I can. I think I'm afraid if I let anyone get "too close" to me. Fear that I wouldn't like certain qualities of theirs and try to control them. I don't want to control people. I just want them to do what I want them to do.

I think it is going to storm again. I'm going to go downstairs and see if my dad is home yet. I don't like him driving at night when there aren't food warnings, let alone when there are. I'm a bit of a daddy's girl.